Sometimes, forums throw up genuinely interesting questions.
To be honest I suspect I'd hate being a Hot Woman (tm). Sure it has perks such as people buying you drinks but there are huge disadvantages.
First off, being an attractive woman seems to give off the idea that ones body becomes a feel-up free for all whether one wants it or not. Big boobs are apparently public property. That presumption continues to the idea that if one is attractive, one is easy. If one isn't easy that it's this incredible weight upon the people one rejects because they can't be attractive. You don't want to make men feel insecure right you heartless bitch? Gotta fuck 'em all.
Second point. People assume that being attractive negates any other worth or capacity. We are encouraged to work on our looks because if we do we don't need to be smart, or hard working. Think of the term "gold digger".
Women are also taught to hate each other. I wish I was joking. If someone is attractive whether they spend hours working on it or not we are in competition with them for the best guys. We're told to be jealous of the way a attractive woman can hold herself in company, the attention she gets because those are the only things which (apparently) show worth in a woman.
Lastly, even if one is an attractive woman, one still gets lumped with all the double standards and bullshit which come associated with being Damned Whores or God's Police. If an attractive woman refuses to be promiscuous she's a prude and shunned. If she is promiscuous she's a slut. If she tries to find a happy medium she's both depending on who asks. How does one escape this? Why, one finds a Man to date exclusively and puts up with all the other women talking behind her back in jealousy.
This isn't the case for all women, not even close. It's the undertones and undercurrent of social interaction, media and the like. I know a lot of women who have very close female friends. Hell, my core group of friends is three women and an androgynous person. We don't snipe at each other for all we're encouraged to. Might be the drastically different tastes which are involved.
Being female doesn't stop us from talking about sex and football. We drink beer. We fart. We get angry and punch shit. Not all of us do (well, except for farting), but nor do all men do those things either. The sex of an individual is determined by genetics, not habits.
BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVISSIMA!(i think i spelled that last one right but you get the idea)
ReplyDeleteI love you. Have I told you that lately. You got into my mind with what I wanted to say :)
I have an interesting perspective on this since I've been able to sit on both sides of the fence. At 17 I had a bad facial injury that required 5 reconstruction surgeries so for some time my face was disfigured (the plastic surgeon did an excellent job at restoring my face to normal looking and you can't tell now). But the kind of treatment you get as a female with something wrong in the looks department is just appauling. I was told by my mother I'd have to go purely by personality from now on. People wouldn't hold a door open for me when my arms were full carrying boxes and all sort of cold-shoulder type treatment including not helping when I needed it and not looking at me when they were talking to me. I was also treated like I was stupid, as though my facial assymetry had something to do with my IQ and coherence. I was left out of events. I joined a small artist's group and right in front of me on my first day there they discussed wheather I would be acceptable to their group due to my apperence (they decided it was "ok" :rolleyes: ). You rarely see this kind of bullying aimed at "ugly" men, if at all. I'm lucky that I got my face fixed up as well as it was and I have great amount of empathy for people who are disfigured.
ReplyDeleteTesseract, I'm glad to hear you were able to have the surgery. I've never faced that kind of stigma for all I'm far from the Hot Woman ideal.
ReplyDeleteSo much of that comes from a crippling subconscious knowledge that being able-bodied is a very temporary thing. An accident can take it away, disease, physical violence. People are very different once you bring that fear to the surface and make them acknowledge it. I suspect we'd all be a lot more polite if understanding just how fragile our bodies are was common. It's rare for people to regain their health from debilitating occurrences. Lance Armstrong is the exception, far from the rule.